- First place: Olive Snook
- Second place: Pinky McCoy
- Third place: Lucas "Shoey" Shoemaker
- Fourth place: Gordon McSmalls
All bets were on John Joseph Jacobs and his horse, All the Gold, to win. Jacobs has won every single horserace he'd entered that season. However, one of the four competitors of this competition, namely Pinky, had sabotaged his girth, which caused him to fall off and be trampled upon. All four jockeys took an oath of secrecy, which, at first, Olive tried to oppose. After his supposed death, they set fire to his saddle.
Jacobs did, indeed, die, but was revived by 10,000 volts of electricity. His legs were not so lucky and were replaced by those of All the Gold, the rest of whom was buried in Jacobs' tomb in secret by Mamma Jacobs.
After winning first place, Olive Snook quit racing and locked up her trophy and winnings in a safe deposit box so that she would forget her guilt. She later became a waitress at The Pie Hole, where she still works today.
Pinky McCoy became a bartender at the Saddle Sores Salloon for horse jockeys, but met his end when he was trampled by "the ghost" of John Joseph Jacobs.
Lucas Shoemaker became a blacksmith, but also met his end when he was trampled by "the ghost".
As for Gordon McSmalls, he became a drunk.
- The title is a play on 'jockey' and other, less PG-13, themes.