Wikia Daisies - Wilfred Woodruff IV
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Wilfred Woodruff VI is the descendant of Fambing Woo, a Chinese immigrant who became an accidental Confederate hero during the Civil War. Wilfred wrote a death threat letter to Lawrence Schatz for stealing Fambing's Civil War sword and selling it in an online auction. Shortly after Lawrence's death, Wilfred confronted Louis Schatz, who choked to death in surprise. In an attempt to avoid possible criminal prosecution, Wilfred tried to frame Ned for the deaths.


Early life

Wilfred grew up with a great sense of pride in his "great-great-great-great-grandpappy," Fambing Woo, and with his Confederacy heritage. He was very active in Civil War reenactments, and was named the alternate sword-master at the Southern Area Regional Volunteer Infantry Reenactment regiment on three occasions. His grandfather, Wilfred Woodruff IV, was to be buried wearing his reenactment uniform and holding a sword that belonged to Fambing.[1]

Stolen family heirloom

After funeral director Lawrence Schatz was discovered to be robbing the dead, Wilfred was horrified to discover the sword was being sold in an on-line auction for $1,200. He traced the auction back to the Schatz brothers and, in a moment of passion, wrote a threatening letter to Lawrence that said "looking forward to killing you soon." In investigating the letters later, Charlotte "Chuck" Charles found the letter "particularly angry," even among the 1,866 other letters.[1]

When Wilfred got no response, he went to the funeral home himself to confront Lawrence, but instead found him dead in his bathroom. He saw Ned fleeing the scene and believed that Ned killed him, unaware that he actually had inadvertently exchanged Lawrence's life for Chuck's. A few days later, Wilfred broke into the funeral home after hours to confront Lawrence's twin brother, Louis. Surprised by the intrusion, Louis accidentally choked to death on the cow tongue steak he was eating.[1]

Attempt to frame Ned

Wilfred realized from his threatening letter and presence at both deaths that he could be held accountable by the authorities. Feeling he had no choice and believing Ned had killed Lawrence, he decided the next day to frame Ned for Louis' death by planting his body in a kitchen cooler in The Pie Hole and calling the police.[1]

Later that same day, Wilfred broke into the funeral home again to search for the sword. He found it among the other stolen valuables in the basement, but shortly after taking it, Ned entered the room after bringing Louis' body back to the home. Wilfred tried to hide underneath a sheet on one of the slabs, but Ned believed him to be a dead body he accidentally resurrected and started touching his face. Wilfred attacked him with the sword but Ned, citing his enjoyment of Star Wars as a child, proved to be a surprisingly good sword-fighter. Wilfred tried to attack Chuck when she entered the room, but Ned threw his sword into the wall, tripping Wilfred and sending him into the feet of Emerson Cod, who was stuck in a nearby window and kicked him unconscious.[1]

Wilfred was arrested and, according to news media, charged for his involvement in the deaths of the Schatz brothers. Since Wilfred did not actually kill either man, the exact charges remain unclear.[1]

Personality and traits

Wilfred Woodruff has a tremendous amount of pride in his Confederate heritage and an extensive knowledge of Civil War history; he quotes Civil War figures from both sides of the conflict. He has a southern accent and is an excellent swordsman from participating in his many Civil War reenactments. Wilfred has an aggressive personality and does not hesitate to threaten the Schatz brothers after learning of their crime. He also shows more regard for self-preservation than respect for the law, as demonstrated by the great lengths he goes to to frame Ned and avoid possible criminal persecution.[1]


  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 1.6 The Fun in Funeral

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